Diary Of A Crazy White Woman

Missing In Action and BIG NEWS

Ooooh, I have been missing in action.Sorry.

A few Lay outs to show you.

This is one of my favorites at the moment. I am very ignorant when it comes to photoshop. But, I learned how to do this from Gloria's blog. She had a little tutorial so I thought I would try it. I absolutely love how it turned out. Thank you Gloria!!!!!

This one I just thought was really cool but, it was not recieved well at Two Peas. My thumbnail got screwed up so I think that was why it may not have been seen much. Anyway, I thought it was cool.

Okay, are you all ready for some BIG news? I am taking a hiatus from scrapbooking until further notice. However, I will continue to do my DT at Scrapping The Music and my circle journal. After that, I will decide if I want to continue this scrapping journey. I will also be cleaning out my gallery at 2ps. and will put them in an album on my blog... so let me know which layout are your favorites and I will make sure I load them.

Okay, now I am off to the gym...it's leg day...ugh!!!!!

New layout for Scrapping The Music. This week's challenge is the song You'll Be In My Heart by Phil Collins. I have never really been a fan of Phil but I'm really loving these lyrics.

I was very disappointed in my scan....hence, the lo looks way better in real life.

Hehe...check out my man hands.

The journaling reads:

come stop your crying

it will be all right

just take my hand

hold it tight.

Hehe...check out my man hands.

If you have not done this challenge site then... what the heck are you waiting for? You will have a chance to win a cool prize package. Who doesn't like to win stuff?

My wonderful friend Andrea has tagged me to do 7 random facts about myself. Oooh, this could be scary.

1. I was dignosed with degerative disc disease in my early 20s-it affects three discs in my lower back and I am always in pain.
2. I can't stand my skin to touch-okay, that's a weird one.
3. I had three different majors in college-psychology, chemistry, and pre-pharmacy.
4. I was sexually abused at the age of five and my attacker was never caught- I can say this here because I am NOT ashamed anymore.
5. I played soccer in high school and breifly in college.
6. I want to adopt a disabled Dachshund
7. I worked at a home for mental patients that had been just released from the hospital-no, I really wasn't a patient.

Oh yea....here are the rules:

1. Link the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 random facts about yourself.
3. Tag 7 people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs.
4. Let each person know that they've been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

I tag:

Aleida

Heather

Kirtsy

Tammy

Liz

Joscie

Holly

Well, I am done for the day.

our little picnic

I need to do this more often. I need to spend more quality time with my children. The other day my Mark's truck wouldn't start so he had to take my car and I Abigail and I were stuck home all day. I was so hating life because it threw my routine completely out of whack. But, it ended up being a wonderful day. Abigail I went on a picnic in our backyard.

Poor Albert didn't get come out until we had finished eating. Gee, I wonder why.

I just love that photo of Albert running after Abigail. It's like "wait for me sissy!"...she actually has a bag of corn chips, that's why he's running for her.

BAD DOG!!!!! He finally got the bag.

At the end of the day... I was thankful Mark's truck wouldn't start because it made me stay home. Otherwise, our little picnic probably wouldn't have happened.

This week at Scrapping The Music the new song is My Wish by Rascal Flatts. The lyrics for this song are amazing. Those of us that are mothers can totally relate to this song. I have always had hopes and wishes for Abigail but never could get them down on paper. But, this song absolutely says it all.

Also, there is another giveaway this week. It is a really cool Halloween kit...but, you have to go to the Scrapping The Music site to check out.

Okay so here is my layout for the song.

PS. Abigail is really not a sad child. I have to usually photograph her when she's not paying attention to me and completely off guard. Otherwise we would have some really goofy pictures.

Lots to talk about

I apologize to all of you who have sons from my last post. I do realize boys and men are affected by the media and society. I must have been suffering from tunnel vision since I only have a daughter and two nieces. All of this is a complex matter and when you throw males into it...it gets wickedly complex. So, my apologies.

I don't usually post layouts on my blog but I will today...it's pretty sentimental to me. Why do I not show lay outs here? Because If you see them here you won't go to the gallery...Yes, I know that's just darn awful. Here's the journaling: Not a day goes by that I don't wonder if you will end up like me. Will you or have you been cursed with depression? I already see so much of me inside you that I have to ask myself if I have passed on this genetic code to you. If I have then please forgive me...I did not mean to. I pray to God you never endure this.

I got an awesome package in the mail the other day...love that mailman...from the ever so fabulous Gloria Froese. Lots of vintage and unique little pretties. Can't wait to use it but right now I am having so much fun just looking at it all. Gloria has a book coming out soon and is having sneak peeks on her blog. You are out of luck if want to purchase one because only so many were produced. There are lots of scrapbookers that  I admire and blah...blah...but Gloria's work constantly leaves me speechless and almost takes me to a different place.                                                                                                       

 

Abigail did very well with her minor surgery. She actually had to have some cavaties filled but they had to put her to sleep for it. She has teeth like mine...soft enamel. They gave her a drink to make her sleepy and it didn't work so they just went ahead and did it. But, she finally dozed off during the procedure.

Here she is getting ready to leave. And yes, there is Albert. If you look close at the couch where the pillow is...yea, the mud...that is where he waits for the mailman.

Here she is taking her medicine that she REALLY HATED.

I'm outta here. Got lots to do today!

Serious Post Today

I try to stay away from serious subject matter on my blog because I like to reserve it for my scrapbooking. But this, I could not help. It is a subject matter very close to me. Linda sent this to me yesterday. My heart sunk.

Most of you who know me know that I am a recovering anorexic so that is why this is so personal for me. However, eating disorders are very complicated so I won't go into all of that. It is amazing the influence society plays in our lives as woman. Girls are being influenced at a much earlier age now. Girls are dieting way too early.Girls are being treated for eating disorders as early as 12 years old. Girls are wanting plastic surgery. Thousands of years ago it was survival of the fittest. Now, it is survival of the most beautiful, the thinnest, etc. In my house, we do not use the F word, we do not talk of tummy tucks (though I am guilty of wanting one and have even done a LO about it), diets or eating disorders.

I am guilty of what society has done to influence the perfectionistic attitude towards us but....I will not let them do it to my daughter. I may want to have a tummy tuck or breast implants, a chemical peel or whatever but I will not have my daughter's self-esteem destroyed by America's view of what is beautiful. I have tried to raise her to love herself, her body, and her beliefs.

Today and everday, hug your daughter, your neice, your friend, your cousin, or your aunt and tell them they are BEAUTIFUL!!!!!

Also here is a poem I'm to leave you with that I used on a LO for Abigail. I do not know who it was written by. This Lo will be published in an upcoming book. I'll give details on that later.

Little one I pray you'll never know this struggle

This is my greatest fear

I thought by now I would have recovered

But now life has chosen a different course

You are still too young to understand

But the time for your realizations is coming soon

What will I tell you?

How do I explain or justify

My need to be bone thin?

My love for you is everlasting

I will continue to fight this disease

I can face anything as long as I have you

You are the love of my life

The reason I have not already given up

You are my legacy

My hope and salvation for a better tomorrow.

Talk to you all later!

Wow

Wow, it seems like I have been gone forever. I promise I will not turn into one of those once a week bloggers (uh, Linda you listening?).  If I have not been to your blog lately then I do apologize...I will get there.

Okay, went to the pumpkin patch and it was better than I thought it would be. And guess who I ran into? My biological mother...do you want to see her? Are you ready?

 

Well maybe she's really not my mother but she did cast a spell to make me take her picture.

and here is the pumpkin patch...

Most of my pictures didn't turn out because it was very overcast that day. The photos of Abigail weren't good either because all you could see was her hand in front of her face. Definately my child.

I have to tell ya'll a story about a conversation between Abigail, Mark, and me. Yesterday Abigail said she wanted a baby sister. At the moment, I wasn't really tuned in until she said something about a baby in my tummy...that really got me listening. Mark told her if she got a baby sister it wouln't come from my tummy. (IF....what the hell...there is no IF...I was thinking). He tried to explain to her IF would be through adoption. Well, she starts asking questions about adoption so Mark tries to tell her about the things involved in adopting...you know, the paper work, the home study, and the MONEY. Mark said it was very expensive to adopt. Abigail, bless her heart, said we could have a lemonade stand to help raise money to adopt her sister. I thought I would cry when I heard that. The pure sweetness of a child. Before your thoughts go any further...I am not planning on adopting...a human anyway.

Abigail will be having minor surgery on Thurday...more on that tomorrow...hopefully!

Got to go for now but I WILL be back...

Fall has arrived. I love this time of year although it brings mixed emotions for me. This is the time of year when my mind plays tricks on me. By that I mean, emotionally. Fall has proven to be a difficult time, it brings back memories I care not to think about. I get real depressed and anxious. I associate my "past" with this time so I struggle at times. This is what I am talking about for those of you who do not know me. And this has always been the result. So...a message to Fergie...big girls do cry. Okay, enough drama for the day.

Today I am off to the pumkin patch with Abigail and her school. Twenty 3-4 year olds...I will be crying.

If you have not been to Scrapping the Music you need to go. This week they are having prizes.

See ya'll later...

Yesterday, when I woke up I went to the computer to check my e-mails. When I lifted the top there was a note...Happy Anniversary! Oh crap...I forgot my wedding anniversary. How on earth did I do that? What kind of wife forgets their anniversary? It's usually the husband. I'm lucky Mark just laughed it off though. Although I get ill about him leaving his shoes on the floor, not changing the toilet paper roll, or just being messy in general...I am lucky! Mark makes it to where I don't have to work, we don't have to worry about medical bills, we don' t have to figure out how we're going to pay for groceries or a new pair of shoes. We have a beautiful home (though the yard could use some work). And although he didn't want to pay $2,500 for Albert's back surgery, he did.He has worked really hard to get where he is and I love him for that. I love him for being frugal, his consistancy, his hard work, his intelligence, and his love for me and Abigail. I thank him from the bottom of my heart for everything he has done. I thank him also for being able to put up with me and my peculiar ways.

Check out Abigail's Cinnabons she made with her EasyBake oven. I didn't eat one but she and Mark said they were excellent. Maybe I should start using the EasyBake. You can do real food in those things too.

I also want to say: Happy Birthday to Angel Ava. You will never be forgotten.

Ya'll have a good day...I'm off to the gym and then to buy Abigail some jeans.